Elton John who is first of all, not a housewife, wants to be on Desperate Housewives.

He is reportedly begging Teri Hatcher to help him land a part.

The singer is said to have approached Hatcher, who plays Susan in the show, when she starred in his video for 'Turn The Lights Out When You Leave'. Elton is quoted as saying: "It's so bitchy and funny! I'd love to do 'Desperate Housewives!'"

I wonder what his role will be.

Maybe he can be an older version of Mary Alice's son... errrr.... whatshisface... hmmm.... Dana? I can't seem to remember his other name.

Christ.

All this work has made me even more of an amnesiac.

Oh yeah.

ZACH!